René Staab

 

“Uhh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to..A man of little height stuck his head through the door, grinning from ear to ear as his gaze fell upon the actress.

“Come on in!” The man with the camera in his hand replied. “Look here! Have you ever seen such a thing? One can simply not stop progress. It is terrific. Ain’t it? See how easy it is! You don’t even have to..

“What is that thing? And why the hell is she...? Hmmm... I see! This must be one of these things that I’ve recently heard about.”

“It is some kind of machine that bleaches your skin. It is a one of a kind invention. Our people of the stage department developed it in order to highlight the beauty of our actresses. Isn’t it just gorgeous Ms K.?”

“It certainly is Mr Klein!” the actress exclaimed.

Shy and somewhat puzzled she sat in front of, what must have been a hundred light bulbs around her. Edginess was in her face as she played with the mirror and the circular shaped piece of cotton, she had just used to put on her make up for today’s role. A sloppy and despicable little scene about the tragedies of WWI, and how the soldiers of her fellow country have been betrayed for ages now.

A few years ago, she had welcomed her husband back home from the battle field. He had fought bravely in this terrible war and almost died at the very forefront in France.

The two plates, either one of it cut out in half circles, separated her head from the rest of her body in order to prevent her from going blind by the enormous amount of light that came from the bulbs. There she sat! Two, more or less, complete strangers looking at her and talking about the technical inventions of these days (apparently). It was always about inventions, progress, and greatness it seemed to her. No matter how many people had died and suffered from the latter. Of course she knew what the two men were really thinking at this very moment. She just wouldn’t admit it to herself. Why else would the fat stage director in front of her pan down the camera from her face down to her knees, rather than focusing on the technical details of the superior invention?

“There will be a time when men simply can’t tell anymore whether the girl is 17 or 70, right?” The intruder proceeded. “God knows what the future brings. But one thing is for sure: The sun is going to shine brighter and brighter for us decent German folks. We just seem to be unstoppable. Be it for our own pleasure or to show the world what it means to mess around with us! Outstanding, Mr. Klein, just outstanding!”

Mrs K thought about what happened to her this morning while she listened to Mr Grinny-face. Besides, grinning was an important gesture that she, not just because she was an actress, had to exercise practically all the time. Anybody who didn’t follow the rules of these days was likely to be never seen again. ‘But what’s the point in complaining? Whether you’re here or somewhere else, it just doesn’t matter’ she thought by herself as the two men continued their conversation.

“Have you read the most recent review in the New York Times on Mueller’s script for the new play? Those bastards didn’t say a good word about it. Outrageous! Just outrageous to see how once good and decent Germans betray their country for a little appreciation from those filthy Americans. - Nothing is left from the usual intention and spirit of the original play - Haller was considered one of the most outstanding artists of our country! And now this! Who

 

the hell do these people think they are? As if they knew how things used to be back then in our very own country. I am pretty sure that this is some kind of conspiracy against us. Just cannot imagine that Henkel would do such a thing after all.”

‘It does matter! It really does matter. There is a difference between being a part of it and working against it’ Just as she heard the two people speak about the review of the play it was inevitable and overwhelming. She tried to get away from it all! She tried it more than once! This morning she even was on the ship in order to leave it all behind. Diving into a new world. A world without restrictions it seemed. A world without all the kitsch, spying and blackmailing. When she got on board she had watched a worker polishing the portholes in order to prepare the ship to its long journey to the promised land, when she once more realized that she just couldn’t do it! It was not that she didn’t have the means and the connections that were required. It was that she always thought about afterwards! Afterwards! What if she made it here back home and all the others didn’t. It was simply too risky to throw away your whole career, the one and only goal you were working towards since you were able to think. She couldn’t throw it away for some political prank. But what if the war really starts and things get out of control? She had already started to burn her bridges. Former friends started more and more to turn their back on her and left the country. She had to make a clean sweep with them. ‘Do I?” She asked herself half aloud. The two men looked at her for a little moment and then eventually continued their conversation.

“No, Henkel would never do such a thing. All they want to do is tear us apart. How else would he still live in Switzerland if he had anything against us? Everyone who feels no connection to this beautiful and sublime country and its people is free to go. Whenever he wants to go, wherever he wants to go. The German people have no interest in such half hearted, unpatriotic folks.”

‘After all it is still my decision!’ She replied to herself. ‘God knows where and in which horrible theatres I would have to play, in what shabby clothes they would put me.’ She took a deep breath: ‘After all, there is still my father I have to look after. One can simply not compare one person to another. We are all different individuals! I’ve got my very own plan!’

“Yeah!” She replied. “May they all rot in hell! We’ll see each other in Valhalla!” she said out aloud.

“Exactly! Mrs K., exactly!” Grinny-face and Mr Klein confirmed. “That’s the spirit!”